culture lost?

I certainly do think so. I feel strange in a culture that once used to be mine but has now become a blurry something that does not give me what I expect from my own culture - a feeling of being home. I live here, I love to see my friends and my family again but apart from that I feel terribly strange in this country. The time in Hong Kong and beyond has been such an intense one and coming back from this chaotic place called Asia has taken its toll on me (or better a piece of my heart from me).

As lovely as it is not to be travelling and changing positions daily brings me back to a slower life that I do not accept as it is. The independence, the anarchistic approach and lifestyle of backpackers is lost for now and I don't know when (if ever) I can be part of it again and if my approach to be free in such a pretence that travelling appears to be to me is possible.

For now I have to live and adjust in a culture that I enjoy for trivial reasons but has lost a big part of me to a different part of the world.

"Le temps le plus important c'est la première fois.
Le temps le plus important c'est la deuxième fois.
Et après ça la troisième fois et on recommence.
J'ai perdu les habitudes de ma jeunesse et je me
sent désunis et à part de ma propre histoire
et on recommence."